Professor Layton: Question and Answer!
by Evilsingingllama
Summary: You ask questions, they give answers! What's that I see? Another crappy chapter, waiting to be read. Go on... Click on that button... You know you wanna read it... Prepare to be dissapointed!
1. Intro

"**There are quite a few Question and Answer fanfics out there, but I noticed there are absolutely NONE in the Professor Layton section!**

I'm sure there's something you want to ask a Professor Layton character, so when you review, put in a question! I might sound grouchy by putting in rules but...

Rule 1: No questions like: 'Layton, what happens in the second game?' or 'Luke, do you know the answer to puzzle 5?'.

Rule 2: It doesn't have to be Layton or Luke, you can ask questions to Flora, Chemley, Ingrid, Bruno, etc!

Rule 3: No Diabolical/Pandora's Box questions! That game hasn't came out in UK so I'll just answer it by what I read on Wikipedia!

Rule 4: If you think I got the character personality wrong, pop that in the review and tell me! I'll edit that chapter so the character's right.

Rule 5: Have fun and feed the badger!" Luke read aloud, holding an odd letter in his hand. "Professor, what do you think it means?"

Layton paused, rubbing the brim of his hat, "I'm not sure, my boy, but I think it has something to do with that girl..." Layton looked towards the author of this fanfic, who was waving at them and holding a torture mechanism.

**Click that silver button below and ask some questions!!!**


	2. ReinaMatsuo

**Woop! Got some questions already! Thanks Reina-Matsuo, your English is awesome!**

_Luke, my boy, what is your 'true' relation with Layton? I mean, is he more than a mentor for you?_

Luke went deep into thought... "Why do you want to know, creeper!?"

"Hey! Don't be mean to the question givers!" Clora yells, fixing a torture devise on Luke's head.

"Fine! I'll answer the question... I see him as a father really... My real father—"

Clora interrupted, "There you go you can answer a question! NEXT!"

_What about Flora? Is she a sister to you or a little more? Aren't you jealous of her?_

"Why would I be jealous?" asked Luke.

"No answering questions with a question!" shouted Clora, pushing a button activating his torture device, cackling when Luke screamed in pain.

"Arrggghhh! Okay, okay! I don't see Flora as a sister and I'm not jealous of her..." Luke blushed slightly, "Can I go now?"

Clora paused for a moment...

"PROFESSOR! PROFESSOR!" Luke began screaming, even though Clora hadn't done anything. Layton ran into the room.

"What's going on?"

"Professor she's--"

"Professor... Would you mind to answer a few questions..."

**Press that shiny button below!!!**


	3. Kira the Torage

**Kira the Tora-ge! Wassap!? Since you have only one question some drama's gonna happen!**

_What's it like living in London?_

Luke stood on the chair, "London is the bestest place in the world! It's the only city I've been to, but I know it's the best!"

"Luke, don't be judgemental on other peoples living areas." said Layton fairly yet firmly. "London is a rather nice place, it has many tourist attractions like Big Ben, which is actually the bell inside the tower... That reminds me of a puzzle!"

Clora drummed her fingers on the table, "We don't really have time Prof--"

"There was a donkey called Belle-- ARGH!"

Clora released the button on the torture device "I said no! Bad Layton! Now sit!"

All of a sudden a girl who looks like the author (only in hippy clothes) ran in, "Imposter! Clora, get back in the writer's head! I'm supposed to be hosting this question and answer!"

"You'll never get me Cocopops!" Clora turned into a cat and made a break for the door, only to be grabbed by Luke.

"She likes me! Cat's love me!"

All of a sudden Clora disappeared in a poof of Caramelldansen goodness.

"Right then, let's answer some more questions... Push that shiny button below!"


	4. Paige Fox

**I got five reviews already! Bwhaahaahaa! Paige Fox, these are you questions!**

_Professor, why is the Layton-Mobile red? Was it the only "extra tall for top hat" model available?_

"That's two questions." corrected Layton.

Cocopops glared, "Just answer them! Don't be mean to the reviewers!"

Layton rubbed the brim of his hat, "Mmm, well... The Layton-Mobile is red because things in London are famous for being red, like telephone boxes and buses. I had it specially made so I could wear my top-hat inside it. I just like to be the height of fashion. One is such a good catch for the ladies!"

"Mhmm, okay then...NEXT!"

_Luke, do you have a favourite colour OTHER than blue?_

Luke put down Clora, who ran away immediately, "What?"

"Pardon, my boy." Layton corrected.

"Yes Professor! Pardon?"

Cocopops sighed, "Red, white, grey, black, green, pink, purple, maroon, lime, turquoise, gold, silver, yellow, brown, lilac, orange."

Luke pouted slightly, "I only like blue..."

"Question answered! NEXT!"

_Luke, why does your hair stick out like that?_

Luke blushed slightly, "It suits me, does it not? When I joined the Professor, he had a 'hats only' policy, so I had to get a hat. I worn it for so long my hair almost moulds into the shape of my hat." Luke took off his hat and showed his hat-hair.

"Eww... NEXT!"

_Luke, why don't you wear you suspenders?_

"My what?" asked Luke. Layton sighed at Luke's rudeness.

"Your braces." said Cocopops.

"Oh. I like to be a fashion icon! I want to be a puzzle-solving, animal-communicating male model when I'm older! I'm just trying to be cool..."

"...Yet failing miserably." Cocopops quickly added, "The next question will be delivered by chipmunks!"

Two chipmunks ran into the room, carrying a rolled up sheet of paper.

_Flora, why is there a crystal ball in your little house at the top of the tower? Or a huge globe?_

Flora smiled, "Because Papa gave them me so I cherish them in my heart forever!" Some sad music began to play, "...But then I lost them when the mean gentleman smashed the tower!" Flora burst into tears and hugged Luke.

There was a sudden change in atmosphere. "NEXT!"

_Bruno, how come you can RUN WITH A FREAKING ROBOT ON YOUR BACK? And still much faster than Layton or Luke?_

Bruno smiled, "I used to enter in the Olympics! The 'Carry-the-bag-of-robots-with-a-guy-in-a-top-hat-and-a-blue-boy-chasing-you-100m.'"

"...And also we didn't know what to do when we caught him, so we just let him run off." explained Luke.

Clora turned back into a person with a poof of caramelldansen goodness. "What's with that kid and cats!"

As Clora continued to complain about Luke, Layton whispered something to Cocopop's ear, "Kill... ...Her..."

Cocopops pushed the button and held it until Clora died. Everyone cheered. Clora then walked into the room, "That was a robot!" Don Paolo grabbed hold of robo-Clora and jumped out the window.

"What a strange man..." murmured Cocopops. "Click that button of awesomeness below!"


	5. Sukairaaaaaa

**Sukairaaaaaa! This is for you! Did I put in enough A's?**

_Layton, what's under you hat, and when you die, can I have it?_

Layton shuffled uncomfortably, "A gentleman never lies so..." He took off his hat to reveal a small orb, "This is the centre of gravity! That's why my hat never falls off, even when I'm rescuing children!"

"So... What happens when you die Professor, does Sukairaaaaaa get it?" asked Cocopops, throwing real Clora out the window.

"Pardon me, my dear, I didn't quite catch you..."

"Does Sukairaaaaaa get the centre of gravity?"

"I apologise but you seem to be singing..."

Cocopops groaned, "Does the reviewer, Sukairaaaaaa, get the orb?"

"Oh no! I don't even know this person and they have so many A's in there name! Instead I'll give it to my child!"

Luke cheered, "Thanks Professor!"

"Not you, my boy! Flora! She of course gets the top hat is well... Flora, when you get this hat, don't destroy it. You must wear it or the world will end."

"Yes Mr. Layton!" Flora saluted.

"Mhm... O-kay then... Click that shiny button below!"


	6. Darkstar Runner

**Uhhh... Weird questions from weird people... Behold the wonders of Darkstar Runner's questions...**

_Luke, oh... What would you do if I say... I suddenly went crazy and decided to eat you? Would you scream? Be terrified?_

Everyone looked at each other, "Did you read that question out right?"

"Yuppa... So then Luke, what would you do?"

"I'd get... Eaten... By a... Crazy lady." said Luke slowly.

"Would you scream and be terrified?"

Luke nodded obediently.

"The lie detector says your lying!" Cocopops pointed at Luke, "OBJECTION! Bring in the cage..."

Some oompa loompa's dragged out a cage, containing Darkstar Runner. "When do we get paid?"

"After you have sung and danced! Now back to work!"

The oompa loompa's grumbled and left the room... They should of never assassinated Willy Wonka.

Meanwhile, Cocopop's opened Darkstar Runner's cage. Darkstar Runner grabbed hold of Luke and attempted to eat him. Luke screamed and peed himself.

"There we go! One of life's great questions answered! Luke pees himself if you try to eat him! NEXT!"

_Professor, same question. After all, a gentleman always puts a ladies needs first, and never refuses the request of a lady._

Layton chuckled, "I never refuse the request of _beautiful_ ladies. I'm sure you look like a man-eating wolf or something..."

A grumpy old man with a beard walked in, "Hershel Layton! Number one rule to being a gentleman is that every woman is beautiful! Give me your licence!"

Layton handed the old man him Gentleman's Licence.

"You're banned from being a gentleman for six months!" the old man waddled out the room.

"Ugh... NEXT!" shouted Luke.

"Hey, that's my line pee-pants!" growled Cocopops.

_Luke and Layton, if A=B, but B=/=D, does the chicken crow in the morning._

Luke and Layton were standing in a gameshow like area, with buzzers. Layton quickly pressed his, "No, because only roosters crow, mainly in the morning!"

"I think that's correct..." said Cocopops, looking at her lines, "They didn't put answers on these cards! Oh well... Layton, you win your hat back!"

Layton caught his hat and placed it back on his head. The gameshow area turned back into the room.

"One more question... NEXT!"

_Luke, do you enjoy hanging round with the Professor all day?_

"Wow, that question is surprisingly normal..." said Luke, rubbing his chin.

Cocopops gasped, "I know! This person is mental and her friend wants a picture of you naked!"

Luke went pale, "What? Where'd you see that!?"

"On her profile." everyone replied.

Luke ran out the room.

"Look's like we can't answer that question Darkstar Runner! Oh well... Click the DAZZLING button below, sing oompa loompas!"

While the oompa loompas danced and sang, everyone crowded round the window to see Luke running.

"Wow, that kid can run really fast when he wants too... Hey... Since when could he bash down walls?"


	7. BestyFriday

**This time it's BestyFriday!**

_Flora, do you love Luke?_

Flora was sitting on a chair, completely alone in a room. "Yes! And he loves me too, I know it!"

_Luke, do you love Flora?_

Luke was sitting on a chair, with everyone. "What!? No!! I'm not going out with Flora!"

"We didn't ask if you were going out with her..." CoIcopops said slowly.

Luke blushed so violently it punched everyone. "Well... Uhm... Mhm..."

Meanwhile, Don Paolo and Flora are talking. Well... They're listening to Luke saying "What!? No!!" and Flora's crying.

"How about we take revenge on Layton!" Don Paolo cackled.

Flora looked up at Don, "Why would we do that? It's Luke I'm mad at. You're the one with no girlfriend." Flora skipped out the room.

"LAYTON! I WILL have my revenge on yo--- ARGGGHH!!" Don Paolo slipped on Flora's hair ribbon that had fallen off, and fell out the window.

Luke was busy explaining to the grow-ups that he and Flora were having a secret relationship, but then Flora appeared out of no-where.

"Traitor!" she yelled!

"Flora! I... Ugh... I can explain! Press the shiny button below... PLEASE!" Luke said quickly.

Everything went blank, apart from Cocopops screaming "Hey! That's my line!!!"


	8. DragonsAreFriends1

**!SPOILER ALERT! This chapter contains minor spoilers on the third game... !SPOILER ALERT!**

**I just wanna say, I try to update it as often as I can. Sorry if you've been waiting for your question, I promise I do it in the end!! DragonsAreFriends1, this is yours. Every part of it is yours. You OWN this chapter! Well, not really...**

_Professor, you and Luke travel a lot... So... Has he or you ever gotten sick while on the road? Or in a town maybe? And if so, tell me about it._

Layton rubbed the brim of his hat and chuckled. "There has been one time..."

Luke's eyes widened, "No Professor! Don't say it!"

"When we were heading to St. Mystere, Luke said he wasn't feeling rather well, so he opened his window and..."

"Please, Professor!" Luke begged.

"...And he ate a dragonfly. I handed him the letter to distract him, but when we reached the village he was rather ill...""

"Hahahaha NEXT!" Cocopops shouted.

_Luke, how well do you say the Professor get along? More like 'Family' or 'Best friends' or just 'Student and Teacher'? And why?_

"I say we get along like Student and Teacher sometimes, though we do act like Family. I don't know how a real family acts because my real family--" Luke was interrupted.

"NEXT!"

_Flora, have you ever thought of taking Martial Arts so you could fight back ANYONE who would try to kidnap you?_

Flora paused, "It isn't really my sort of thing to fight someone... I prefer dancing and ribbons and..." Flora kept listing all the things she liked.

Cocopops waved her hand in Flora's face, "She's gone to a land of hopes and dreams for a while... NEXT!"

_Don Paolo, IF you ever managed to beat Layton what would you do with your life then? Have you ever thought things through all the way..? Heh... Ever thought of therapy??_

"Therapy!?" Don growled, "I don't need therapy! All I need to do is beat Layton so then Claire and world domination is mine!!"

"Paolo, Claire's de--"

"Nyeh heh heh heh heh! And when I am the Evil Emperor of the World, people will be squirrels and all dance around singing 'He kiiilllled Laaaayton! Heee destrrooooyed Laaaaayton!' Of course I thought thing's all the way! And when Layton _tricked _Claire into loving him--" Don Paolo cackled manically, before slipping on a sponge and falling out of the window."

"Is it just me or is he really unlucky?" asked Cocopops.

Luke was quick to answer, "Who cares? He wants us all to be squirrels!"

"What was that sponge doing there anyway?" asked Flora.

"Oh... I was cleaning up after Darkstar Runner. I must of left it there..." murmured Bruno.

"This is... Uhh... When the fanfic... Mhm... Becomes inter... erm... interactive... Press 'A' so Luke... Ugh... eats the... S-s-ponge. Press 'B' so evil chipmunks-- Oh screw that! Click the pretty button BELOW!" yells Cocopops, giving up on reading the lines.


	9. Darkstar Runner 2

**Yo peeps! Sorry about the one-week wait. I had stuff to do... And it had NOTHING to do with the llamas *sweats* Guess what! Only one week until Professor Layton and the Pandora's/Diabolical Box comes out in the UK! *giggles* **

**Darkstar Runner NUMBER 2 *DUN DUN DUUUUH!* **

Renia glares at the people. Don Paolo was the first to react. "Who the hell are you!?"

Renia sighed and took off her bandana mask, "I'm Cocopops' replacement since she didn't read the lines."

"Sounds plausible." Don nodded then glared at her, looking at her assassin clothes, "Why are you dressed like that!?"

"I'm a Guild Wars Assassin."

Luke hid at the word 'assassin'. Layton spoke this time "Pardon me for asking, but Guild Wars is?"

Renia sighed again, "A game. Like your game is Professor Layton."

There was a silence.

"Kill her!" shouted Claire, using the torture machine on Renia until she died.

Cocopops then leaped into the room to save the fanfic from becoming a Professor Layton and Guild Wars crossover. "Can we get some questions please!?"

_Layton, if I were to kidnap Luke, what would you do?_

"Hang on a second, where is Luke?" asked Flora.

Cocopops pointed at the window, "Oh crap! Darkstar Runner's kidnapping him!"

Layton grabs hold of a dart gun and shoots Darkstar Runner, forcing her to let go of Luke and fall out the window. Layton blew away the smoke from the gun and tipped his hat, "And that is what I would do."

"Uhm... NEXT!"

_Also, if I did manage to eat yo- I mean, Professor, what would you do if the world ran out of tea?_

Layton's eyes widened and he fell on his knees.

"NOOOOOOO!!!!" he screamed before leaping out of the just-fixed window.

Cocopops tutted, "That poor window... How many people have jumped or fallen out of it now? Five? Did Layton even know that that was a question?"

Luke peered out the window. "He's okay! He turned his hat into a parachute! He's climbing up the wall!"

Layton slid back into the room from the window, dusting himself off when he landed on the floor. "Phew... Don't panic, the tea is still there..."

"Um... Yes... Yes it is- NEXT!"

_Professor, please can I eat you? I mean, we've already established that I am a beautiful lady, no matter what they say! Words can't br- erhem. Yes. Actually, you never really answered the question last time..._

Layton sighed and jumped out the window again.

"Well... It looks like we can never answer that question, Darkstar Runner..." said Cocopops gloomily, "Instead we're tell you the meaning of life, something people have been trying to solve for years!"

_***~The Meaning of Life~***_

~The property or quality that distinguishes living organisms from dead organisms and inanimate matter, manifested in functions such as metabolism, growth, reproduction, and response to stimuli or adaptation to the environment originating from within the organism~

_**~*The Meaning of Life*~**_

"What was THAT!?" barked Don Paolo, "That's just the dictionary meaning!"

Cocopops nodded, "But it is still the meaning of life, is it not? Now where were we... Ah yes... NEXT!"

_Hey Don Paolo, do you need any evil minions? Cause I willing to... be an evil minion. I could, like, eat Layton... or Luke... or something._

Don cheered, "I knew that poster would help! Right then... Before you become an evil minion, you must prove yourself... First with evil laugh exercises! Laugh with me! BWHAHAHAHA! One, two, three. BWHAHAHAHAHAAA-- COUGH COUGH COUGH! Uhh... And now... You must prove yourself... Through theater!"

Don Paolo jumped on a stage and began to sing, clicking his fingers to the beat! "I maaaay not be dressed in orange and black, in a top hat. I may not save child-er-ran eveeryyywhere I goooooo. I may not have a little robot dog, or a picture of a soooow. I may not have the woman I looove, and that is just where the list goooes... At least I'm not a stupid Professor! At least I don't get followed by strange children! At least I don't risk my life, at least I'm not a peedooo--"

"STOP THE SONG!" squeaked Cocopops quickly, "Ahh... Ummm... Let's ignore that, shall we? Press the pretty butto- Luke... Why did you eat that sponge?"

"I couldn't stop myself!"

"Okay then... Press the pretty button below! If you do I'll visit you in your dreams and-- Uhm... Nevermind."


	10. Sukairaaaaaa 2

**Moar!? You can't have moar! *beats Sukairaaaaaa* Joking joking, have as many as you like.**

**Sukairaaaaaa! Sukairaaaaaa! I seriously loled when writing the chappy. I don't now why, it probably isn't even funny.**

The whole Professor Layton cast and Cocopops were standing around a deep pit, filled with the bodies of the reviewers.

"...Paige Fox, Lia300, DragonsAreFriends1. I think that's all of them..." mumbled Cocopops. "Hang on, Darkstar Runner's still alive! Shoot her!"

The Professor pulled out a shot-gun and fired it in the pit.

"Good. Now, on with the mourning."

Everyone mourned over the reviewers tragic deaths. Layton then handed Luke a letter, who looked at it for a while before saying "I don't understand Professor, why are we going to help solve an inheritance dispute?"

"Wrong side fool." grumbled Don Paolo. "You're reading the script again."

Luke blushed, "Sorry! Let's see... What in the-- What's this!?"

"Stop reading the script!" Don flicked Luke's hat off his head. Luke died of head-coldness and fell into the pit.

"You killed me!" screamed Legal, pushing Paolo into the pit.

"I escaped from the farm!" cheered Klaus, running up to the group before they stepped to the side and he fell into the pit.

Cocopops clicked her fingers, going back to the time when Luke was reading the letter.

"Let's see--" said Luke, again, only to be interrupted.

"QUESTIONS!"

_Layton and Luke, which of you loves me more?_

"The Professor loves you more! He talks about you when he's sleeping!" Luke quickly blurted out.

"No I don't!" Layton pushed Luke into the pit.

"Hey!" Cocopops scolded Layton, "What's with all the Out Of Character-ness all of a sudden!"

Luke pulled himself out of the pit. "Okay, I lied. It was wrong of me. I just don't want any more fan-girls chasing me! Some of them stalk me dressed as chinchillas! The Professor still loves you more though. He loves everyone--"

The Professor had dressed himself up as Father Christmas, was sitting in a grotto and had Don Paolo sitting on his knee.

"I want a potato-clock and some speedos!" said Don Paolo.

Layton smiled. "Ho ho ho! Well you can't have any of those because you've been a BAD BOY!"

Don ran off, crying.

"--I don't think he loves Don Paolo."

"Yes... NEXT!"

_Luke, you say you never take off your hat, so does that mean you wear it when you're sleeping?_

"Yes." Luke answered bluntly, stroking his hat lovingly.

"Tell us more!" said Cocopops.

"What else is there to tell? I don't want to say I wear it in the shower or everyone will picture me in the shower."

Cocopops coughed slightly. "Next..."

_Chemley, can I have a cookie?_

"No, they're all mine!" Chemley shoved all the cookies in his mouth, "The bestest cookies in all the land..."

Luke then took a cookie from a bowl. "Did you buy these cookies? It says 'made in China' on the bottom..."

"He must of, unless his wife brought them from Iceland..." mumbled Cocopops.

Everyone shuddered. Iceland Cookies...

_Dahlia, why are rich women like you so obsessed with cats?_

Dahlia froze, "I'm not obsessed with pussy-wussy-cats."

Awkward silence...

"So maybe I enjoy their company. You just have to adore their cute 'ickle facey-waceys!" Dahlia fussed Claudia.

Cocopops then clapped her hands. "Dahlia, I got something for you! I been trying to get rid of it, but I think you'll like it!"

Cocopops handed Lady Dahlia a card-board cut-out of Professor Layton dressed as a cat.

"Why do you have that?" asked Layton, rubbing the brim of his hat.

"Long story... That's all we've got time for folks-- or that's all I'm bothered to write losers-- I just have one favour to ask... I would at least _like_ to know that my dear reviewers are still alive. Feel free to review even though you have no questions... Or you'll be in the pit!" Don then ran up to Cocopops wearing a speedo and a potato-clock and pushed her in the pit.

"Holy cr--" Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzh.

~Oopsies!~

~We're just having some minor problems with the characters.

We'll be back shortly~

~Oopsies!~

In the background, the sounds of Cocopops beating up Don can be heard.


	11. Paige Fox 2

**I just found out in 'Last Time Travel' Flora also solves some puzzles :D I seem to have a queue of questions. One down, eight more chapters to go... P-P-P-P-Paige Fooox! Your questions please!**

~Oopsies!~

~We're just having some minor problems with the characters.

We'll be back shortly~

~Oopsies!~

--Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzh-Tzk!

"Okay Don, here's the bill..." Cocopops handed Don a bill. Damage costs. "And give me the potato clock..."

Don handed Cocopops the potato clock miserably.

"...And the speedos."

Don handed Cocopops the speedos miserably. "B-But wearing speedos was my second dream..." Don Paolo burst into tears and jumped out the (new) window.

"...Questions..."

_Layton, what's your favourite tea?_

Everyone looked at Layton, as beads of sweat gathered on his forehead. "I-I-I-- I can't take it anymore! Claire! Tea! I'm coming!" Layton leaped out of the window.

"Did he know I was here?" asked Claire.

Cocopops shrugged. "He did call out for tea is well. NEXT!"

_Flora, what was your favourite attraction in your amusement park?_

"I love the Ferris wheel! Doesn't everyone love it!? The last time I saw it, it had crashed into the lake. I wonder how..."

"It chased me and the Professor!" exclaimed Luke.

Flora tittered, "Oh Luke! You can be so funny sometimes!"

"Wait I have proof!" said Cocopops, pulling out her shiny red DS lite, and clicking on the movie.

Everyone gathered round and watched.

"Luke... When the Professor saved you, you called him dad." mumbled Chemley.

"No I didn't!" protested Luke.

Cocopops clicked back on the movie and, surely enough, Luke makes a noise that sounds like he's saying 'dad'. (Seriously, check it out! Just when the Professor saves him, Luke makes that noise, if you listen carefully he says 'dad'!)

"BWHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAAA! Next."

_Luke, what happened to the robotic dog...?_

Luke scratched his head. "I don't know... The Professor said he was taking it out and it never came back..."

Just then, the Professor came flying through the window, his hat had propellers sticking out... Which looked a lot like the dog legs...

"Professor!" squealed Luke, looking at the propellers.

~Oopsies!~

~We're just having some minor problems with the characters.

We'll be back shortly~

~Oopsies!~

Cocopops strolled into an empty room. "I have an important matter I want to discuss with you. I'm thinking of writing a little drabble called 'Goodbye Forever' (a LukeXFlora) about Luke dying and Flora (and Layton!) trying to get over it. I'm just wondering, does it sound like a good idea? Please, press the shiny button below so I can make the choice to kill Luke. Smiles!"


	12. DONT MESS WITZ DA LLAMAZ!

**DON'T MESS WITZ DA LLAMA!!! A _very_ special chapter for our little rule breaker, the anonymous 'jonathan michel'.**

"Everyone ready!?" shouted Clora.

"Yes ma'am!"

_Please can you tell me a website were i can find the answers to 'Professer Layton and Pandora's box' so if i get stuck i can get help. Please can you tell because i am really stuck._

Everyone gasped and/or fainted.

"Everyone knows that the writers OC-self takes rule-breaking VERY seriously." Clora shouted.

"Yes ma'am!"

Flora scratched her head, "Where is Cocopops?"

"In hospital..." said Layton. "Her head blew off when she read the review... Which reminds me of a puzz-- Good lord! Darkstar Runner escaped!!"

Everyone watched as Darkstar Runner swallowed Luke.

"Who could of done this!?"

They all glared at Jonathan Michel. Darkstar Runner ATE HIMZ!

**The end.**


	13. ALOT of people

**This chapter belongs to *deep breath*: Amaya Zorifuki, 'Quint', 'shoodaawhoop', Kira the Tora-ge AND jesse9870; because they all asked only one question. (Lia300, you will own the next chapter!)**

Cocopops was pointing something out. "See? I told you begging for reviews would work!"

_Mister Layton, you're a gentleman type, so what happens if you come across a woman who prefers to do without that kinda stuff? Like a lady who'd rather get her own coat and door? Or even better, a punk type?_

"I never heard of such a thing!" gasps Layton. "Well, I'd do anything so she's happy, that's what a true gentleman would do."

Cocopops (who has recently recovered from... **THE REVIEW!**) hugs the Professor. "Hug me back."

The Professor looks at Cocopops before hugging her back.

"I feel SO much better now!"

"Ahem... Next." mumbles the Professor.

Cocopops stops hugging him. "That's my line!!"

_"Professor" Layton, if your out solving puzzles all the time then when do you have time to teach? Do you even really have a job?_

"Of _course_ I have a job!" scoffs Layton, "And what does the reviewer mean by 'Professor'? I only solve puzzles and save children in my spare time, I actually spend a lot of time teaching about artefacts and..."

While the Professor continued to babble on about history... Uhh... Stuff, Cocopops shuffled up to Luke.

"Luke, how can you spend time with him?" whispers Cocopops.

Luke didn't move. "I'm sorry, I don't believe you asked the question in a review."

Cocopops attaches the torture device on Luke's hat. "Tell me now..."

"I learnt to sleep with my eyes open."

_Luke (and everyone else),do you like doing the Caramelldansen?_

"Do we!?"

Everyone then stands up and begins caramelldansen. A disco ball and flashing lights hit the floor.

"Dansa med oss. Klappa era händer. Gjör som vi gjör. Ta nagrå steg at vanster. Lyssna och lar. Missa inte chansen. Nu ar vi har med. Caramelldansen!"

"English lyrics now!"

"Dance to the beat, Wave your hands together. Come feel the heat, forever and forever. Listen and Learn, It is time for prancing, Now we are here with Caramel Dancing!"

"O-O-Owah owah! ...NEXT!"

_Luke, I was wondering... If you and I ever met in life, would you like to visit me?_

"I'm sorry I can't. Only if we're friends because the Professor says I can't go with strangers. And Flora says I should stay away from girls. And my agent says I should stay away from Fan-Girls." Luke explains.

"You have an agent!? Cool!" Cocopops clapped her hands. "So who is your agent!? Roger the Pigeon? Simon Cowell?"

Gordon Brown walks into the room and waves.

"...Oh. How did you get the Prime Minister to be your agent?"

"I swapped some sugar pebbles for him."

"Ah... NE--- What the!?"

Gordon Brown then takes off the mask, revealing Darkstar Runner.

"Oh crap." mumbled Cocopops, loading her dart-gun.

Darkstar then coughed up... Luke?

"But that means there is an imposter..." The Professor looks at the Luke who had been with them the whole time.

"Nyeh heh heh heh heh! Foo'ed you again, Layton!" Luke then rips off his face to reveal Don Paolo.

"Oh no. It is Don Paolo." said everyone blankly.

"Also what's with the Mr. T impression?" added Flora.

"I PITY THE FOO'-- Nevermind..." mumbled Don, before leaping out the window.

Then, Darkstar Runner rips off her face to reveal Don Paolo, who rips off his face to reveal Layton, who rips off his face to reveal Lady Dahlia, who rips off her face to reveal Matthew, who rips off his face to reveal Simon, who rips off his face to reveal Flora, who rips off her face to reveal Luke, who rips off his face to reveal Inspector Chemley, who rips off his face to reveal Augustus Reinhold, who rips off his face to reveal Claudia, who rips off his face to reveal Bruno, who rips off his face to reveal Ingrid, who rips off her face to reveal Ramon, who rips off his face to reveal Percy, who rips off his face to reveal, Gordon, who rips off his face to reveal Deke, who rips off his face to reveal Marco, who rips off his face to reveal Crumm, who rips off his face to reveal Don Paolo again, who rips off his face to reveal Darkstar Runner again, who rips off her face to reveal Don Paolo, again again.

"What was the point in that?" asked Cocopops. "...Actually don't answer the question and leap out the window."

Don Paolo sighed and jumped out the window.

"NEST!"

"Pardon, I think you mean next, my dear."

"Shut up... Professor." Cocopops glared at the Professor.

_Luke, what do you truly feel about Flora?!_

"I-- Erm... I mean, ahh.." Luke went bright red. Not red-red, but not slightly peachy either. I'd say more a reddy-pink. You could say he went red-red, but that would be strange.

"Spit it out boy!" barked Chemley.

Layton paused for a moment. "Should we give the boy some space?"

"Yeah okay." Cocopops clicked her fingers and blankets landed on everyone's heads.

"That's not exactly what I meant."

"Oops! Silly me!" Cocopops clicked her fingers and everyone was standing in their underwear.

"Don Paolo! How many times must we tell you-- No speedos!" scolded Flora.

"I did not mean this either."

"Fine..." Cocopops grumbled, clicking her fingers again so everyone was in their clothes. "Get in a line."

Everyone (except Luke) queued up for jumping out the window.

"_Right then Mr Triton."_ came the voice of the darkness. _"You may answer the question."_

"I'm in..." Luke trailed off to a whisper.

"_WHAT? I'M SORRY I DIDN'T HEAR YOU."_

"I... Uhh... I'm in..." Luke lowered his voice. "...Love."

Everyone flew in through the window and Clora clicked her fingers, making the room look like a church. Luke was in a tuxedo and Flora was in a wedding dress.

"Ah!" Luke looked around. "I'm too young to get married! And where did Cocopops go?"

Clora paused. "Oops. Wrong fanfic." Clora summoned her horse +Anima and jumped out the window.

Cocopops walked in. "She's not a +Anima. Just a centaur!"

"No she isn't. She is a +Anima, you just don't want to make it a crossover." corrected Luke.

"Okay. Fine..." Cocopops clicked her fingers again so everything was back to normal. "That's the end! Please fill out the form below by coping and pasting it into the review (remember to fill out the information!) and click that pretty button below that looks the a line that has 'Review this Story/Chapter' written in green while the actual rectangle is white. Also keep in mind that the rectangle is 6cm long and 8mm wide."

--------------------------------------------------

**Protect the Windows Organisation (The PWO)**

_Abuse to windows is a horrible crime that ultimately touches us all, both as a society and as individuals. It is a documented fact that many serial killers began their life of violent crime by abusing windows._

_Window abuse comes in many forms - from senseless acts of neglect and intentional harm, to the unspeakable treatments lab windows endure in the name of science and research, to the ghastly treatment received by windows on food farms. _

_If mankind is to improve, we must all take our role of guardian of the windows seriously. _

_We must be the voice for the voiceless._

_This past July, a 16 week old window was tortured and left for dead in a diaper box at a gas station. A man stopped to put air in his tire and saw the box and heard a whimper. He opened the box and to his horror found the window with PVA glue in his eyes, nose, ears and throat. His glass had multiple fractures. The man took the window to the window-specialist were he had to be euthanized due to his injuries. 'I can't fathom how someone could do this to a sweet, loving and innocent window. I cry when I think of what this window went through. He was probably wondering what he did wrong and why won't this evil person stop. Windows only want to be loved and they give so much love in return. The window in this story is named Buddy and in Mississippi we are trying to get a law passed to make it a felony for window cruelty. I will fight forever if I have to. Buddy will always be in my heart and I will continue to help support my cause forever.' says the man._

We are trying to stop window abuse, but we can't do it alone. We need your reviews to help protect these poor windows, and to fund for window specialists. If you want to help, fill in the form below:

**Pen-Name:_______________**

**Do you have a window? ____________**

**Llama-Land Address: ______________**

**UACF (Utterly And Completely Fake) Tele. Number (please enter by banging head on keyboard):_____________**

**I want to donate _________ Review(s) to help stop window abuse.**

**Number of Review(s) enclosed: ____________**

**Please make Reviews payable to: Evilsingingllama,**

**12 Llama-Land Drive,**

**Llama-Land,**

**Terms and Conditions:**

**Evilsingingllama will not be responsible for not returning Reviews.**

**We will not use your fake details for fraud or display them to the world.**

**If you hurt a window, Darkstar Runner will be forced to eat you.**

**Darkstar Runner, we will not force you to eat people, we know you will swallow them anyway.**

**If you have broken a 'Question and Answer' rule, you CANNOT join the PWO.**

Windows give me more pleasure through the viewfinder of a camera than they ever did in the crosshairs of a gunsight. And after I've finished "shooting," my unharmed victims are still around for others to enjoy. I have developed a deep respect for windows. I consider them fellow living creatures with certain rights that should not be violated any more than those of humans. ~Jimmy Stewart

_If we work together, windows can live a happy life._

----------------------

**YAAAY! LONGEST CHAPTER IN THIS FANFIC!!!!**


	14. Lia300

**Good news kiddies! Professor Layton and the Pandora's Box officially comes out in the UK TODAY! Of course I'm not getting it today, I'm getting it tomorrow... I just hope they have more stock than the last game... Lia300!**

"We now have proud sponsors, the PWO!" Cocopops cheered.

"The fake window abuse company?" asked Luke.

Cocopops shook her head. "No. It's not a fake-fake company, it's a real-fake organisation."

"Oh."

"See? There's a difference when it's real-fake!"

_Luke, did you ever have a crush?_

Luke began sweating. "No, I never had a crush! Never ever! ...Please don't make Flora hurt me!!"

Cocopops strapped the torture machine on Luke. "Jeremy Kyle, read out the lie detector results!"

Jeremy Kyle looked at his card. "IT SAYS THAT LUKE IS LYING. TELL US THE TRUTH LUKE OR I WILL SHOUT AT YOU SOME MORE. YOUR PATHECTIC! GO HOME, BACK TO YOUR WIFE AND KIDS--"

Cocopops pushed Jeremy Kyle out the window and pushed the torture machine button. "Luke, tell us the truth."

Luke screamed in pain. "AAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!! I'll talk I'll talk! Umm... It was before I met Flora and--"

"TRAITOR!" Flora grabbed hold of Luke and bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzh.

~Oopsies!~

~We're just having some minor problems with the characters.

We'll be back shortly~

~Oopsies!~

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzh- tck!

A man was standing in front of a brightly coloured door. "Hello children, let's see who's behind the evil door of complete doom today. Oh look! It's Darkstar Runner! Let's wave at Darkstar Runner, children! Hello Darkstar Runner!"

"Hello Darkstar Runner!" said the bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzh.

~Oopsies!~

~We're just having problems with focussing on the story.

Please watch-- or read-- this advert while you're waiting~

~Oopsies~

"Ohmygod! What's wrong Skippy?" said a little boy to a kangaroo.

**Skippy's back!**

**Better than ever!**

**Because now... He speaks!**

"My hedgehog got squished by an iche chream."

"Ohmygod, Skippy! That's terrible!"

"Shut the *edited* up, sprog child! Tch tch tch!" The kangaroo ate the boy.

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzh- tck!

"HI I'M A SHOUTY MAN AND I WANT TO TELL YOU ABOUT FLYING LLAMAS. THEY FLY! THEY FLY SO WELL, I'M NOT SHOUTING **LOUD** ENOUGH!"

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzh-tck!

"Phew..." Cocopops rubbed the dirt off her face. "It's a good job that elephant didn't kill us and saved us from the rock that was falling off the volcano of doom! Hey Luke... I never knew you could summon the Egyptian cat gods."

"Indeed. Let's Caramel Dance!" said the Professor.

Everyone began dancing again.

_Flora and Luke, do you actually go school, aside from your adventures?_

"Yes." said Flora. "We don't go on that many adventures, you just see the busiest parts of our lives you STALKER!"

"Stalker!!" yelled Luke.

"Shun the non-believer! Shuuuun! Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun! Shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun!" said a random unicorn.

Everyone grabbed hold of Lia300 and dangled her over a roaring fire so she could be roasted alive for being so stalker-ish-ly.

"THAT'S THIS CHAPTER FOR TODAY, GUYS. SEEYA SOME OTHER DAY." said Jeremy Kyle, but then Darkstar Runner ATEZ him for stealing lines.


	15. Bladecutter25

**I can now happily say that Pandora/Diabolical box questions are now allowed. I bought the game on late Saturday morning, and completed it in the following morning. It certainly met up with my expectations, and my view on Luke has changed. In the last game I saw him as a hot-headed little suck up... But in this game he was a lot cuter, and funnier! Also I never thought I'd see Layton say 'Never underestimate the power of tea'.**

**In-case you were wondering I completed it in 10 hours and 41 minutes, including credits and blah. It took sooo long and I only have slightly more than a measly 2500 picarats! Ah well... Enjoy, Bladecutter25! I must apologise is well, I didn't have much random-inspiration for this chappy, so don't expect to laugh your arse off.**

_Flora, have you ever gotten so angry at someone, that you wanted to kick their **?_

"Uhmm... No." Flora fiddled with her ponytail, innocently.

Cocopops pulled in a dummy, which looked a lot like Don Paolo. "To test zis theory, ve're going to zee if ze girl attackz ze dummy."

Flora glared at the dummy before throwing her boot at it and knocking it's head off.

"Ah! Zis provez that ze girl haz mental problams! NIXT!"

_Luke, when did you discover your strange ability to communicate with animals?_

Luke scratched his hat. "I'm not really sure... I guess it was when I got bitten and/or attacked by an animal for the one hundred and twenty-sixth time... I think I was six then..."

"Ahahaha... NEXT!"

_Professor Layton, how many fangirls, pardon me 'Female Admirers' did you have back when you were dating Claire, and do you still have them? P.S. Sorry to bring her up, Professor._

"Well, I cannot stop being so completely irresistible to the opposite sex. It's not my fault wonderful women see me as the 'Indiana Jones' of the puzzle world. I've always had female admirers _before_ I met Claire, and I still have them now! It's not one's fault one is such a good catch." Layton tipped his hat and winked. "Just so you now, I only have Luke around so I can save him and be seen as 'The Puzzle-solving tea-loving gentleman who saves children and uses big words, plus he wears a hat'"

"Ah yes... It all makes sense now... ADJACENT!"

_Claire, did you receive any threats from the 'Female Admirers' of Hershel, or have sane admirers come up to you, and tell you how jealous they were of you?_

Claire jumped through the window, landing in the question room. "Hmm. Well, I never received threats in anyway... And no-one ever walked up to me to say they were jealous... Oh wait! I got once letter once, but they sent it to the wrong person..." Claire took a letter out her pocket. "It reads:

_**OMG LUKE! U CRIBABY! SUCK IT UP AND TELL THE PROF HOW U FEELZ, MATE!"**_

"What!?" Luke squeaked. "That's not nice!"

Cocopops knocked off his hat. "Suck it up, crybaby."

Luke glared at Cocopops, before his eyes widened and he gasped at Cocopops. "It was you! You sent the let--"

"NIXT!!! Ah! Darn those German accents! So addictive!"

Layton rubbed the brim of his fine hat. "I believe there are no more queries from this user."

"Is it just me or would the Professor make a good surfer?" Cocopops pondered aloud.

"Oh yes!"

"Certainly!"

"Why wouldn't he?"

"I thought so..." Cocopops nodded. "Anyways! Feel free to click the life button below, keep in mind you can now ask questions to Diabolical/Pandora's Box character! Also, you can ask Klaus, Legal!Luke and Claire, I just don't know their personalities... Apart from Klaus is kinda crazy and that Legal _should_ act like a grown-up Luke... Claire is unknown..."


	16. eliasbloodmoon

**!CONTAINS MILD SPOILERS ON SPECTERS FLUTE!**

**Hey peeps! Sukairaaaaaa, you have opened my eyes to a new nickname! Everyone must now call me Llama-Chan! In-case you're wondering, my superhero name is 'Reviewer of the Unreviewed'. BWHAHAHAHAAA-- *cough cough* This chapter is for you, eliasbloodmoon!**

**Also, Level 5, I'm free if you want a person with a REAL British accent for the Last Time Travel XD I like the the Caramelldansen girl in the trailer! XD**

**  
**Cocopops handed everyone a letter.

Chelmey let out a gruff laugh. "So now we must call it Llama-Chan?"

Cocopops pushed the torture machine button. "No, you must call HER Llama-Chan."

"Why Llama-Chan? Didn't she like the name Creator?" asked Layton.

"I believe it was 'Chuck Norris', Professor."

"Ah. Well, yes however they are exactly the same thing."

"I guess you're right... QUESTIONS!"

_Hey, Luke. Big fan of yours, love the hat, etc. Now that we're done with the pleasantries..._

"Aww." complained Luke. "Can I have more compliments, please?"

Cocopops pushes the torture machine button. "No! Bad munchkin!"__

Luke, If Layton was out on a job and would be gone for a while so you got the mail and found a job in a small city and the case intrigued you, would you go and do the job yourself just to prove your epicness?

Luke thought for a moment. "Okay! I'm 100% epic, only about half of it shows in the games."

Cocopops nodded. "It's true... The boy can do more than talk to cows."

"I eat sponges to-- AAIIIGGGHHHH! Let go of the button!!"_  
__  
If so, Luke, what would you do if you got caught up in a strange conspiracy and ended up teaming up with a bunch of strangers to stop a dark alien god from coming to Earth and destroying us all as a part of the job?_

"Isn't that basically Specter's Flute?" Luke questioned. "AAIIIGGGGHHHHH!"

"No answering questions with questions!"

"Okay, okay! That sounds a lot like Specter's Flute, so I'll go around and tell everyone that the world's gonna end." said Luke.

Cocopops smiles. "That's a better answer, munchkin!"

"When did I get the name 'munchkin'?"

"In the video with Flora and the dog ,Tom ,you pull a grumpy little munchkin face at Layton."

"No I do not!" Luke exclaimed. "What is a munchkin face anyway!?"

"NEXT!"

_  
Layton, if the incident I just made happened, would you be mad at Luke for going out on a job on his own without your permission even though he did save the world at the cost of some sanity and health?_

"Is it Luke's sanity and health which would be damaged? --AHH!"

Cocopops releases the button. "Tut, tut, tut, Layton."

"I suppose I would be slightly agitated."

__

Also, Layton, if you were on that job instead of Luke, what would you do? I have a funny story involving this question actually...  


Layton tipped his hat. "I would save the world with my puzzle-solving top-hat and my children saving skills! I wouldn't mind if I got killed, the world is nothing now Claire--"

"NEXT!"__

Flora, if Luke did go off on said job, would you go with him to help him out?

"Umm... Yes. I would go to... Ahem... '_Help him out'_... Next?" asked Flora only to be shocked by the torture machine.

"BAD FLORA! Do you want to die!? No? Then leave Cocopops's line alone!" Cocopops growled.__

Paolo, you annoy me, so could you just go die, please and thank you?

"What!?" Don yells. "Why would you want me to die!?... That reminds me of a Layton-hating song... Puzzle..."

Don Paolo jumps back on the stage. "OOOOOOOOOOH! I have a beard, Layton does not! I have a bald spot, Layton does not! I don't have an annoying crazy side-kick, Layton does--"

"Layton's twice the man you'll ever be!" Cocopops grabs a rifle and shoot's Don Paolo. "And don't call munchkin annoying! It's not his fault he's reta--"

~Oopsies!~

~We're just having some minor problems with the characters.

We'll be back shortly~

~Oopsies!~

**Review that thang!**


	17. Spaztron The GiraffeKitty

**Mowam peeps! It's 69 days until ma birthday! XD That means it's... 81 days til Christmas? *maths is hard* Anyways! I'm happy this MORNING (or night if y'all in the US) because I been looking at PL fanwork :D It makes me so happy! Also Bladecutter25, don't feel bad! I just didn't have any crazy ideas *I was the person who slapped you XD*!!**

**Thanks to you, Darkstar Runner, the anonymous 'Quint' and Paige Fox, we were able to stop window abuse in this chapter! **

_Professor Layton, how on earth did you not notice that "Chelmey"'s face was made of rubber (and therefore actually a mask)?_

The Professor winked. "Because I was sure he looked like one of those celebrities... You know the ones with the rubber faces?"

"Oh yes... There are PLENTY of them." Cocopops nodded.

"I was sure he looked a lot like Posh..."

"I think you should stop there. NEXT!"

_Layton, because I'm curious, were you at all the wild type in your adolescent years?_

"Ho ho! Well, I did have the occasional drink and went bed at ten at night. I went to one of the roughest universities in Cambridge! Also I couldn't help but be a babe-magnet with a car like mine..." The Professor continued to talk about his wild-times in the library studying history stuff and solving puzzles, not to mention saving children.

"...Next..."

"What happened Cocopops? You usually shout 'NEXT'?" Flora asked.

Cocopops sighed. "It's just... Wee Free Men!!" Cocopops pointed at the tiny blue man_._

"Crivens! NEXT, ye daftie!!" said the little blue man.

_Luke, are you really straight? *gets shot*_

"Nice aim, Flora!" Luke cheered as Flora blew the smoke away from her shot-gun. "And YES I AM STRAIGHT! It's not my fault I have a high voice and I play the violin! Just wait until my voice breaks, just you wait!" mumbled Luke.

"NEXT!"

_Flora, is it true you can't cook to save your life? Hows about giving me a recipe of your, ahem, 'skills'?_

"I can cook! Here's my recipe book..." Flora pulled out a large book and flicked to a page.

**Flora's Cookbook**

_Apple Crumble (Enough to feed five)_

_You will need:_

Apples

Butter

Sugar

Cinnamon

Syrup

Monopoly Table

That little silver dog piece

Hat

Pencil Shavings

Oranges

Ostrich meat ((That's actually quite nice!))

A unicorns horn (rhino will do)

Twelve real live koala bears

Marmite

One of Luke's teeth

The hair and eye-lash from the council of the elves

"See? I can cook!" Flora scoffed.

"Um... Yes... NEXT!"

_Laytonmobile, you must be self-conscious about the way you look. Have you ever considered plastic surgery?_

"To answer this question we need Kandi, the low-cost fairy! Come Kandi, come!" called Cocopops.

A fairy appeared. "What the hell do you want now!? I told already told you-- I can't turn you into a llama!"

"That's not what I need today, Kandi!" Cocopops grinned. "I need you to get the Laytonmobile to talk!"

"Wishy-washy car-talk." chanted the fairy. "Done. When do I get my money?"

"AFTER YOU GIVE MY OOMPA LOOMPA'S BACK!"

All of a sudden, the Laytonmobile started to talk! "...Beep... Please turn r-r-right. Warning vehicle reversing."

Layton cheered. "It's alive! Alive I tell you!"

"I do feel proud of myself for being so unique, know what I mean? I hope to start a fashion trend, but if it never catches on, I hope to be a convertible." beeped the Laytonmobile.

"I love you car." Layton hugged the bonnet. "Who needs Claire when you have a shiny red car..."

"If you want a low-cost fairy, just tell me and I'll pop one in the post! Don't forget to C-L-I-C-K the button of eternal life below! That's right, you no longer have to sing for eternal life, you just press that button below!" Cocopops grinned.


	18. ME?

**ROFL! Luke's voice in the American version is so funny and slow XD I prefer his high and girly british version though... **

**These questions are from a rather beautiful, clever, talented and wonderful sounding reviewer, don't you agree!? XD A quick short one.**

_Professor! Do you rap?_

The Professor tipped his hat. "Brap."

_Professor Laaaayton! Are you the guy off 'Pimp my Ride'!?_

"Why yes, I am. Looks like my disguise didn't work again, Llama-Chan." Layton sighed. "You already figured out I'm your history teacher."

Cocopops nodded and grinned. "Oh yes, I confronted you is well."

_Munchkin-- I mean, Luke! What's your favourite animal!?_

"I quite like cats-- What are you doing!?"

"Oh... Am I not supposed to do that?" Cocopops stopped dunking the cat in the soup by it's tail.

Luke glared at Cocopops. "I'm gonna call the RSPCA on you!"

"I think you better call Child-Line, to be honest Luke." Cocopops shook her head.

Don Paolo then pushed down the Professor's hat over his eyes. "The pedo is down, boy! Run for it!" The truth is: Don Paolo also likes to save children.

Everyone stared at Don until a llama pushed him out the window.

"Llama!" Luke hugged the llama.

Everyone hugged the llama.

The llama then removed it's face to reveal Darkstar Runner.

Everyone groaned and shoved her out the window is well. "We're not scared of you any more, and your vorish ways!"

"Press the SHHIINNY button of doom and destruction BEELLOOWW!"


	19. Darkstar Runner THREE!

**I'm sorry children, I got distracted for a while... Sorry for the wait!**

**Thanks Darkstar Runner, for doing a drawing of the last chapter! Go look at it children, run free! (There's a link to her DA account of her profile!) Oh yeah, also if any of you happen play Sims 3, I made a Professor Layton sim! Gawd, I love advertising on this fic.**

**Thank you Sukairaaaaaa, for giving me your idea of Billy Joe!!!**

_Okay, Layton here's the deal. I have the last tea bag in the world. There are no others. This tea bag is set up to a mechanism where it will not release until... you swallow Luke whole. That being said, would you eat Luke for the tea, or will it be left forever hanging?_

Layton began sweating. "Oh course, I... Umm... Wouldn't-- ah, eat the b-boy_... I VANT MAH TEEAA!!!"_

Cocopops shook her head. "Again with the German accents-- ARRRGGHH!!!"

Everyone stared blankly at Layton as he ate Llama-Chan's OC-self. Zamis then pounced on him. "You ate Cocopops! And you drank my tea!!"

Layton stopped. "No I didn't. I believe that was some other person. Probably another OC that somehow got into this fiction."

Everyone stopped to look at Nylah, who went into a frenzy before leaping out the window. While everyone was distracted, Luke seemed to of disappeared, and Layton was making a cup of tea.

"NEXT!" shouted Cocopops, from inside Layton.

_Luke, what would you do if the PROFESSOR ate you?_

Flora glanced around. "Where _is_ Luke?"

"I am here!" said an unusually camp Luke, bounding out from behind the curtain. Also, he was wearing a jingly hat and tights. "What I would do is I would scream the bloody life out of meEEee!"

"There's something strange going on..." mumbled Cocopops, from the inside.

"Isn't it obvious?" said Layton, beginning to pace up and down the room. "This Luke is exactly seven millimetres taller than he was five seconds ago, which means..." Layton span around and pointed at 'Luke' "OBJECTI-- I mean, you are not Luke! You are Billy Joe, the elf I have never seen before in my life!"

'Luke' pulled off his face to reveal Billy Joe. "One day Layton, I will have my revenge on you! I'll smash you right out of the sky! And by the way, it was 7.1 millimetres!" and with that, Billy Joe knocked off the Professor's hat and leaped out the window.

Layton fell on his knees. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I got it wrong AND my hat fell off!!!"

Luke climbed out the hat. "Don't worry I was in the hat the whole time!"

"It was a good job Layton has those hawk eyes!" Flora hugged Luke.

Luke paused. "So you didn't think he acted strangely?"

"No. We thought you were having one of those camp moments you have."

Luke scowled at everyone. "Since when did I have camp moments!?"

Cocopops tutted, from the inside. "I don't believe you asked that in a review-- NEXT!!"

_Luke, will you pose with this towel for me so I can finally give my friend that picture?_

"Honestly!" said Luke. "You're worst than the Professor on bath nights!"

~Oopsies!~

~A little bit of pedo slipped in!

Sorry LaytonXLuke haters!

To be honest it isn't my favourite slash but it works when you need a laugh~

~Oopsies~

"Let... Gooo... of.... my -ugh!- face!" grumbled Luke as he tried to escape Darkstar Runner's Friend's grasp.

Cocopops (who had just escaped Layton's insides. Sorry kids, you missed it!) pushed Darkstar Runner's Friend. "Quick Luke! Call childline!!"

**Okay, this is just a random question I added in for a laugh. I would of put it in my chapter, but I forgot.**

_Layton and Claire, have you chosen a song to go with your relationship? You know, as a couple?_

Layton rubbed the brim of his hat and smiled. "I think 'Love Game' by Lady Gag--"

"IRIS! IRIS!" screamed Claire.

"--You know better than to interrupt, my dear..."

"JUST GOT WITH IRIS!!!"

"But that has nothing to do with our relationsh--"

Cocopops pushed the mute button. "Okay, those were Darkstar Runner's questions again!! Push the button and hope that Imagination will work soon, peeps!"


	20. LWN Go Moo

**It's been a while peeps! Mowam! Talk to me! This is the 20th chapter (if you don't count the rules at the beginning)! LWN Go Moo! I'm in a really inspired mood, but it's a different sort of inspired. I feel so inspired I could cry. If any of you ever play 'Colour my Heart' or 'Colour my World', you know what I mean. If any of you haven't, you're missing out. Seriously.**

**I was walking around town, and it appears that my city likes unusual street names like 'The Angel Gateway' (AKA an alley) Holy Bones, Elbow Lane, Dolphin Square, Horsefair Street, the list goes on and on!**

**DISCLAIMER (CAUSE I FEEL LIKE IT!!) Children, children, I don't own Professor Layton, I'm merely stealing their personalities for my own personal pleasure.**

Darkstar Runner was near the pit of dead reviewers, running from the crowd, with a swollen stomach.

"Give back the Professor! We need him!!!" shouted Luke.

Flora threw off her dress. It just turns out she's actually a pokemon trainer, in disguise. "I'll catch you! I choose you; Don Paolo!"

Flora then took a small ball thingy from her bag and threw it in front of Darkstar Runner.

"Don Don!" said Don Paolo, climbing out of the ball thingy.

Cocopops gave Darkstar Runner a note.

**Da_rk_**sta_r_ **_Ru_nn**_er,_

**_Pl_**_z give _**_b_a_ck L_**_ay_**_ton_ and I'll gi**ve you** an oompa l**_oom_**pa to e**_a_t.

Cocopops then pushed Darkstar Runner into the pit of reviewers. "HAHAHA!! TRICKED YOU!!"

"But the Professor is still inside her!" Luke said. "Who's gonna go down the pit to save him?"

Chuck Norris then climbed out of the pit with Layton, before roundhouse kicking Darkstar Runner, who was slowly climbing back up.

"QUESTIONS!!"

_Layton, what does a picarat look like? You've probably collected millions of them by now, so you should know._

"A picarat has no true form," said Layton, dressed as an elf (cloak and everything!). "For it is the meaning of life, and we all now the answer to that is either forty-two, or the dictionary meaning, which we shown in chapter eight."

_***~The Meaning of Life~***_

~The property or quality that distinguishes living organisms from dead organisms and inanimate matter, manifested in functions such as metabolism, growth, reproduction, and response to stimuli or adaptation to the environment originating from within the organism~

_**~*The Meaning of Life*~**_

"It also looks like one of these little shiny coin things." Layton took a coin out of his pocket and held it close to his eye. "Look at it shine! Shiny, shiny... shiny.... shiny."

_Luke, is there a word you like to say a lot for no apparent reason? If so, what is it?_

"It just so turns out, I _do_ have a word I say a lot for no apparent reason!" smiled Luke. "In-fact, I have quite a few words! The first is PROFESSOR--"

_***~The Meaning of Professor~***_

~A college or university teacher who ranks above an associate professor.

A teacher or instructor.

One who professes~

_**~*The Meaning of Professor*~**_

"--Another is aurific--"

_***~The Meaning of Aurific~***_

~To cause to appear golden; gild: Dawn came, and sunlight aurified the lead-grey ocean.

To transmute into gold~

_**~*The Meaning of Aurific*~**_

"--And my favourite one is dostoyevski!"

_***~The Meaning of Dostoyevski~***_

~A Russian Novelist~

_**~*The Meaning of Dostoyevski*~**_

"NEXT!"

_Flora, do you have a fear of heights?_

"No." said Flora blankly.

Cocopops sighed. "Why does this always happen?! Give us more detail, Flora!"

Flora nodded. "Okay then. I do not have a fear of heights. I like Ferris wheels."

"Thank you," mumbled Cocopops. "NEXT!"

_Anyone who will answer, when you hear the word 'descendant', what comes to mind?_

"I have ze German acczent again zo ve're going to do an experiment! DESCENDANT!"

A few seconds later, Cocopops began writing down her results on a clipboard.

"Here are ze rezults! I had Kandi ze low cost fairy to tell me vhat happened in zeir mindz!"

**The Title has another title before it, it's called 'The before the Clipboard Title' it is commonly used at the top of a clipboard, so people don't hold it upside down. CLIPBOARD!**

**Experiment 1 ~ Descendant**

_For this experiment, I simply yelled the word 'Descendant' and then saw what the characters thought using Kandi, the low-cost chavvy fairy. Below are the results, I must note that it appears some of them weren't listening:_

**Layton: **_A relative/ancestor_

**Luke: **_Oh no, what did she say? I wasn't listening!_

**Flora: **_I want Mama and Papa baaaack!!_

**Don Paolo: **_If only I could tell Layton my true feelings, then maybe we could __have children._

**Claire: **_Let's play a love game, play a love game..._

**Legal: **_I need to go back into the future!!_

**Klaus: **_Why am I still dressed like this...?_

**Barton: **_Woof woof, I'm a pretty dog. -At this time he was imagining Chelmey saying that-_

**Chelmey: **_Cake. Cake. Cake. Cake. Self-Afflicted. Cake. Cake. HE CHOKED ON A CAKE!_

**Bruno: **_Wheeeeeeeee!_

**Katia:**_ I love my grandfather so much I'm going to have mutated children with him--_

**Anton:**_ SOOOOOFFFFIIIAAAAAA!!!! WHHHHHHHHHHHY!!!??_

**Babette: **_I just sat on my little baby! Help him!!_

**Sammy: **_Spiffins! Let us all mingle on a slice of cake and some Earl Grey HMMMMM, jolly old bean!? -Then twiddles with imaginary moustache-_

**Lady Dahlia: **_Meow._

**Mr. Beluga: **_If only I could look like my brother who is nothing like me...And grew a big nose._

**Experiment 2 ~ Don Paolo Poking**

_For this experiment, I poked Don Paolo for the sake of it._

**Poke 1:** Barely reacted.

**Poke 2: **Finally reacted from the first poke.

**Poke 3:** Glared at poker.

**Poke 4: **Dressed up as oompa loompa to avoid poking.

**Poke 5: **Growled when plan failed, and still got poked.

**Poke 6: **Said something about smashing poker out the sky.

**Poke 7: **Smashed poker out the window.

**Poke 8:** Got angry when saw back-up poker.

**Poke 9: **Began singing. Something about a man who has an obsession with saving children and puzzles.

**Poke 10:** Confessed love for the man who has an obsession with saving children and puzzles. He hoped it would stop the poking.

**Poke 845: **Threw the last back-up poker out the window. Cocopops brought out **_THE MIGHTY CREATOR WHO WILL ONE DAY RULE THE WORLD WITH LLAMAS AND EVERYONE WILL BE CALLED NORMAN AND NORIETTA (A NAME I MADE UP MYSELF) BECAUSE THEY ARE NICE NAMES ALSO KNOWN AS SCAR-FACE, LLAMA-CHAN AND COCOPOPS_**'s OC, Nylah. He tried tossing Nylah out the window but Nylah shredded his face with her teeth. Poking will be resumed in hospital.

**End of the Clipboard Title. CLIPBOARD!**

_Layton, who do you think will win in a screaming match, Lady Dahlia or Mr. Beluga?_

"Whaaat?! I down scream!" shouted Mr. Beluga, quite angrily.

"AIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!" screamed Lady Dahlia. "Someone sat on my CHAAAAAAAIIIIGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

Cocopops blinked. "Oops sorry! I was sitting on your chair, or chaigh as you say it."

Men in white suits dragged away Lady Dahlia while she screamed about giving birth to kittens.

"NEXT!"

_Luke, on a similar note, who do you think will win a fight, Claudia or Precious?_

"I do like Claudia..." said Luke slowly, rubbing his chin. "But I also like Precious... But which is better...? There's only one way to find out! FIIGGHHTT!!!"

All the random people began cheering as two people dressed as Claudia and Precious began fighting.

"See you after the break!" added Luke, pointing at the viewers (or is it readers?).

"Wait...! Wha--"

**Did you wake up on day to find people with clipboards poking you?**

Don Paolo nodded.

**And even though you threw them out a window, you still didn't get charged for window abuse?**

Don Paolo nodded.

A random man in a suit with shiny teeth walked up to him. "That's because no-one cares about windows any more! What do you have to say, sir?"

Don Paolo cleared this throat. "It's so shocking! But then a blind girl shredded my--"

"Thank you, sir!" the random man in a suit with shiny teeth interrupted. "We must stop window abuse NOW. We need it to stop. Full stop. If you want to help window abuse to stop (full stop) then call the number below!"

(0118) 2226787e878787787

**The PWO**

"That's a weird advert." mumbled Cocopops. "Why is there an 'e' in the phone number?"

"It shows that the company is from London." said Luke.

Layton scratched his head. "But we're not in London."

"The real-fake organisation is."

"...Next?"

_If two chipmunks turn into oompa--_

"Wait, we ran out of questions!!" yelled Flora.

Everyone gasped.

"What!? But this was aimed to be the longest chapter!!" said Barton.

"Quick we must do something so it's over seven pages long!" Cocopops rubbed her invisible beard. "Aha! I've got it! Cue the music!"

There was a silence, apart from crickets chirping.

"...Where did the crickets come from?" asked Layton.

Luke quickly threw a box in a bush.

Cocopops vanished, then reappeared.

"What happened, Cocopops?"

"I am not Cocopops..." said the girl who looked a lot like Cocopops. "Can't you see? I'm still in my pyjamas!"

Everyone muttered and nodded.

"I am..." said the girl who looked like Cocopops. The lights went down as she down some strange gestures, building up the suspense. "_**THE MIGHTY CREATOR WHO WILL ONE DAY RULE THE WORLD WITH LLAMAS AND EVERYONE WILL BE CALLED NORMAN AND NORIETTA (A NAME I MADE **__**UP MYSELF) BECAUSE THEY ARE NICE NAMES ALSO KNOWN AS SCAR-FACE, LLAMA-CHAN AND COCOPOPS!**_"

"Why can't we call you your real name, Ch--" Flora was stopped by the music that suddenly came on.

Cocopops reappeared. "I am back..." she gasped at the sight of _**THE MIGHTY CREATOR WHO WILL ONE DAY RULE THE WORLD WITH LLAMAS AND EVERYONE WILL BE CALLED NORMAN AND NORIETTA (A NAME I MADE UP MYSELF) BECAUSE THEY ARE NICE NAMES ALSO KNOWN AS SCAR-FACE, LLAMA-CHAN AND COCOPOPS. **_"What are you doing here _**THE MIGHTY CREATOR WHO WILL ONE DAY RULE THE WORLD WITH LLAMAS AND EVERYONE WILL BE CALLED NORMAN AND NORIETTA (A NAME I MADE UP MYSELF) BECAUSE THEY ARE NICE NAMES ALSO KNOWN AS SCAR-FACE, LLAMA-CHAN AND COCOPOPS**_?"

**_THE MIGHTY CREATOR WHO WILL ONE DAY RULE THE WORLD WITH LLAMAS AND EVERYONE WILL BE CALLED NORMAN AND NORIETTA (A NAME I MADE UP MYSELF) BECAUSE THEY ARE NICE NAMES ALSO KNOWN AS SCAR-FACE, LLAMA-CHAN AND COCOPOPS _**then vanished.

"Oh well, let's dance!" said Layton, ripping off his suit to reveal party clothes.

"Yeah!" everyone else ripped off their clothes as well, to reveal their party clothes.

Then everyone began dancing and lived happily ever after, apart from Don Paolo because he was still in hospital.

"Ask away folks, just keep asking away! If you go on my profile, PLEASE vote for which Luke voice is the best on my poll!"

**Just about eight pages, and the new longest chapter! All I had to do was milk the _THE MIGHTY CREATOR WHO WILL ONE DAY RULE THE WORLD WITH LLAMAS AND EVERYONE WILL BE CALLED NORMAN AND NORIETTA (A NAME I MADE UP MYSELF) BECAUSE THEY ARE NICE NAMES ALSO KNOWN AS SCAR-FACE, LLAMA-CHAN AND COCOPOPS part XD_**


	21. Sukairaaaaaa THREE!

**Hi peeps! This is a VERY SPECIAL chapter (and is the real 20th chapter... I MEANT to make that mistake!) , since it was co-written with Darkstar Runner! Aren't you lucky Sukairaaaaaa?! And so far, UK Luke is more popular in my poll... I know YOU chose Klaus, Darkstar Runner!! *points Phoenix Wright style***

**EDIT: I fixed it, for those for read the dodgy version. I'm sorry, I have no idea how that happened.**

Cocopops pulled the next list of questions out of her pocket. "Okay, peeps, once again, we have questions from Sukairaaaaaa!!"

Question one...

Everyone was looking at something looming behind Cocopops...

"Ah! Look out! Darkstar Runner is right behind you!" Luke suddenly screamed out.

"What? But Darkstar Runner is d-" Cocopops began to say, before Darkstar shoved her entire head into her mouth. Everyone watched as Darkstar hungrily wolfed down Cocopops, before letting out a satisfied belch.

"Well, now that I've gotten a bit of my revenge on yo-" Darkstar began.

"Um, e-excuse me, Darkstar, but what re-" Luke cut in.

"Hush boy! DO YOU WANT TO JOIN HER TOO?!" She suddenly raged out. Luke whimpered and fell silent. "As I was saying, now that Cocopops is out of the way, I would like MY time in the spotlight! Therefore, I shall be co-hosting this chapter of Q&A!"

"Hey, you can't do that!" Cocopops yelled from inside Darkstar Runner's belly.

Darkstar poked her back. "Oh really? Watch me now. Ahem. Oh, by the way, I have good news. Anyone who refuses to answer the questions will not be tortured by Cocopops' evil helmet of DOOOOOOM..."

Everyone in the room cheered.

"However, you will instead be devoured by me. Oh, joy!" Darkstar Runner began to read out the questions on Cocopops' list, which luckily slipped out of her hands before she was eaten. A feeling of dread descended upon all the characters in the room.

Llama-chan used her giant bony fingers to pick up the building, leaving only the window and the characters on the street. "This is what you get for eating me!!" Everyone glared at Darkstar Runner.

"Look what you done." sneered Layton, throwing his hat angrily out the window (that's all the window-abuse this chapter folks!) than boomeranged back.

Cocopops banged against Darkstar Runner's stomach lining. "Just because I'm not there doesn't mean you can go all OOC, Layton!!"

"Questions." said Darkstar Runner. Cocopops died a little inside.

_Layton and Luke!! WHICH ONE OF YOU LIKES ME MORE OR DO I HAVE TO TAKE AWAY YOUR TEA ANDD YOUR HAMSTER?!?!!? Hehe... Don't hate me! T_T_

"Don't worry, Sukairaaaaaa." smiled Layton. "We won't hate you, we'll only sacrifice you the THE GREAT GOD IMHOTEP!!!"

"...The Professor likes you more." mumbled Luke, glancing over at Flora. "Get the tranquilizers, Flora, remember what happened last time the Professor was talking madness. MADNESS! MADNESS, I TELL YOU!"

Flora gave Luke and Layton two tranquilizer pills each.

"If only the pills were the shapes of top hats..." groaned the Professor sleepily, holding one pill close to his eye, squinting.

"NEXT!" shouted Darkstar Runner. Cocopops died a little more inside.

_Legal, can I hug you? Please?_

Legal picked up Luke and shoved him in Sukairaaaaaa's arms. "Technically, you _are_ hugging me."

An oompa loompa walked in and handed Darkstar Runner a note.

_**We knew this would happen. Llama-chan wants you to do another question**_

"Alright..." Darkstar began reading...

_Klaus...can I hug you, please?_

Klaus blinked a few times. "Er... Sure, okay..." He stood up, and went over to Sukairaaaa and let her hug him, standing somewhat limply. The pressure around him suddenly began to increase as her arms came tighter and tighter. Suddenly he turned a tad red. Sukairaaaa thought this was just him blushing, so she squeezed harder. Klaus began to gasp for breath.

Darkstar sighed. "Someone, grab me my crowbar..." Someone handed her a metal wedge, which she then placed between Sukairaaaa's arms and Klaus. There was a quick push, before the two were separated. Klaus took in deep breaths, happy to have life restored to him again.

"Geez...that was almost worse than being inside Darkstar..." He panted.

"Oh, that reminds me..." Darkstar said as she walked over to Klaus. She then picked him up by the neck of his jacket. "It's been two weeks since I've last eaten you. Time to come home!" She opened her jaws wide and began to stuff Klaus into her mouth. He screamed and began to panic, flailing his arms every which way.

"Gah! Wait a minute! You said you promised to stop eating me! AAAAUUUGH!" Darkstar finished gulping down his struggling and noisy form, before going back to the questions.

Meanwhile...

"Who the hell are you?" asked Cocopops, glaring at the newcomer.

Klaus glared back. "I am the greatest."

Cocopops slung one arm around his neck and pulled him to the ground- erm, stomach lining, acids, erm, stuff. "SACRAFICE A CHILD TO THE GREAT GOD IMHOTE--"

_Chelmey, how do you get your coat to fit your boxy figure? No offense..._

Chelmey finished grooming his mustache. "My wife makes it for me... Now what was her name again...? Cake? Or was it carrot cake? Maybe chocolate..."

"Next?" asked Flora. Darkstar punished her, by swallowing.

_Professor, you're a smart dude. Can you tell me an acceptable name for a tall kid who wears green?_

Layton thought for a moment. "...Tree? Is this one of those jokes? What do you call a boy in a hole? DOUG! What do you call a boy in a hole without a shovel? DOUGLAS! Hahahahahahahahhahahahahahahaa-" his laughing was interrupted by Darkstar Runner eating him.

**Inside Darkstar:**

Cocopops glared at Layton, still holding Klaus down. "I told you not to go OOC."

Layton nodded shamefully.

"Go sit on the naughty step and think about what you done."

Layton sat on the naughty step and Supernanny appeared from no where. "Well done, Cocopops! Now you just have to wait his age in minutes, then you can see if he'll apologise."

Cocopops paused. "But isn't he, like, sixty-five million years old? He's seen the dinosaurs!"

_Sixty-five million minutes later._

Cocopops walked over to the naughty step, dragging Klaus along. "Layton, have you thought about what you did?"

Layton nodded.

"Now tell me, what is the answer to the question?"

"...Green giant sweetcorn."

"Well done, Hershel!"

**Outside Darkstar's insides:**

_Everyone, are my questions too random?_

Darkstar smiled and pulled out a familiar looking object from behind her back. "Time to use the clipboard again!"

**CLIPBOARD!**

**Experiment 3 ~ Random Questions**

_MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! The same as experiment 1, reading their thoughts._

**Layton: **Possibly...

**Luke:**This person is CRAAZY! ...but at least she isn't asking to eat us...

**Flora: **Flowers. Flowers. Flowers. Luke. Flowers. Flowers. Flowers. Flowers.

**Don Paolo:** I can think of much better questions... Layton, do you love me? When will you leave Claire? When you leave Claire, will you be with me?

**Claire: **...Do you want love or you want fame? Are you in the game...

**Chelmey: **Hmm... That clipboard reminds me of brownies... Mmm, brownies...

**Barton: **Goodness! We should have been on that murder case three days ago!

**Babette: **OH MAH DARLING LITTLE TOM WHEEEERE ISSSS HEEEEEEEE??? THIS IS UTTERLY RIDICULOUS WHY AM I NOT BEING PLEASED ALL THE TIME I NEED MY DARLING TOOOM!

**Klaus:** When will the crazy person let go of me...?

**Legal:** *sigh* This is distracting me from my big project and plan to get rid of _him_.

**Lady Dahlia: **Meow.

**CLIPBOARD!**

_Layton and Luke, what do you think of my OC, Alice?_

Luke was the first to respond. "So _you're_the freako who made up the weird stalker girl--" he was quiet for a minute. "W-where'd the Professor go? He didn't interrupt me for not being a gentleman."

Everyone turned to Darkstar Runner, very angrily.

"You can't rebel on me!" said Darkstar, evil laughing. "If you do I'll eat you all with my vorish ways!"

"We weren't going to rebel on you..." said Anton, with his old-manly ways. "We were just leering."

"You can't talk! You grew a nose thanks to old age!" screamed Darkstar Runner, swallowing the old man whole. Mental problems strike fast when you are included in this fiction. Trust me kids; don't try this at home.

_Babette, what the HECK is your problem?!?!??!_

"OOOOOOH WHAAAAT PROBLEM MY DAAAAAHLING?" Babette yelled out in the most dramatic fashion she could...or perhaps her most normal... "I JUST SIIIIIIIMPLY LOOOOOOOOOOVE MAH DAAAAAAAAAARLING LITTLE TOOOM!!! SPEEEAKING OF WHIIIIICH... TOOOOOM! WHERE'S MAH DAAAAAAAAAAAARLING LITTLE TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM???"

Out of nowhere, a yelp emitted from Darkstar's belly. She immediately tried to cover it up, but it was too late. "YOU ATE MAH DAAAAAAAARLIN TOOOOOM! GIIIIVE HIM BAAAAACK!" Babette immediately tackled Darkstar.

"Quick! Cut to commercial! NO- AUGH!" Darkstar screamed.

_~*Commercial Break*~_

"_Are you to lazy to cook?" said a woman in a supermarket. "And that's why mums go to iceland."_

_~*Commercial Break 2*~_

_A group of oompa loompas were dancing and singing, as they do. _

_"Oompa Loompa, doompity doo, we have a little story for you. Oompa Loompa doompity daces, you're not allowed to smoke, in some places."_

_They danced a little bit more. "You're not allowed to smoke in a pub!"_

"_You're not allowed to smoke in a club."_

"_You're not allowed to sit on that chair."_

"_If you do you'll be killed by a bear."_

"_Oompa Loompa, doompity doo, we have a little story for you. Oompa Loompa doompity daces, you're not allowed to smoke, in some places."_

**Smoking.**

**Seriously, don't do it kids!**

_~*End of Commercial Breaks*~_

_Sammy, why did you work for your Unko if you wanted to be a rockstar? Btw, love the hair!_

"Rock out, dude!" said Sammy, exaggerating on some rock-style moves. "This ones called the pebble. And now, the boulder!"

Everyone cheered blankly.

"I worked for my Unko 'cuz I needed the work and I could run around singing and stuff, dude," Sammy finally said. "Anyways, where'd the huge dudette go?"

**Inside Darkstar's insides:**

"NOOOO!!!" screamed Cocopops as Babette fell into Darkstar's Stomach (that's right, capital 'S'), immediately squashing the other captives against the lining.

"OOH MY DAAAHLING BOII TOMMY!!" shrieked the dangerously robust woman, her podgy arms stretching for the little dog.

"Ohmigod! Tom had kittens!"

**Outside Darkstar's insides:**

Luke poked Darkstar's squealing belly. "Why are they screaming?"

Darkstar shrugged, and then, picking Luke up by his legs, swallowed him whole.

"So you're just gonna eat all of us now?" asked Chelmey.

"Oh no," said Darkstar, licking her lips happily. "I'm just gonna eat all of you."

"Oh, okay," Chelmey said, going back to eating the clipboard.

**Inside Darkstar's insides:**

"PUUSH!!" yelled Cocopops, pushing the button to the torture device. All the captives yelped in pain.

Klaus stopped pushing. "Let go of my neck!"

Cocopops pushed the button again. "NEVER!!"

Klaus grumbled at Cocopops and continued to help pushing Babette upwards, and out of Darkstar.

"AARRGGHH!!!"

The captives stepped back and Luke landed on Babette, forcing her to land on the floor-- acids, lining, erm, stuff.

All the captives glared at him. "Look what you did, munchkin."

Luke quickly said. "B-but! Cocopops, why don't you use your fairy!"

Cocopops grabbed hold of Luke's neck with her other arm. "She's on holiday."

"Fairy-land?"

"Scotland."

"Oh."

**Outside Darkstar's insides:**

"Mmm," Darkstar belched and rubbed her belly. "Why are they moving...?"

A goth girl stepped in front of Darkstar, with hyena claws and fangs. Darkstar grinned. "Would you like to form an alliance, you're cool?!"

The girl snarled.

"You can be the leader, of course! AAARRGGHH--" Bzzzzzzzzzzzk!.

**We're sorry.**

**The crazed hyena girl is attacking everyone.**

**We'll be back in the next chapter.**


	22. Hikaru the Hedgehog

**It's been a long time! Sorry kids! I _would_ make up a clever excuse*, but I can't be //edited to save this fic going Teen//! And my apologies to Hikaru the Hedgehog! I didn't mean to miss you out!! I just... didn't see it... And for some reason, this 'story' is beginning to form a tiny plot-line around Layton's hat...**

A llama straightened the papers on his desk. The worlds St. Mystery News were on a screen behind it.

"Welcome to St. Mystery News, where we see whats happened in St. Mystere 7/1! Oh, what's this? We have** breaking news! **The Reinhold fortune has been stolen – Wait! Don't panic! It just got covered in a very big rug, it's nothing... I'll see you later on St. Mystery News!"

You are watching the ESL channel, and next up it Big Half-Brother.

In the Big Half-Brother house: All the characters are sat around a table, slamming down cards. Layton is sitting huddled in the corner because gentlemen aren't allowed to gamble.

"Hit me! Hit me! Hit me!" yelled Cocopops.

Don Paolo stopped slamming down the cards. "Haven't you got twenty-one yet?"

"No asking questions unless it's in a review!! Even Luke followed that rule!"

"I sure did!" cried Luke happily from his cage.

"Hit me!" yelled Cocopops again. Don gave her another card. "SNAP!"

"Ooh, we're playing snap!" smiled Flora.

Don screamed. "No we're not! It's my turn now anyway! Hit me!"

Claire slapped him.

"Owww!!"

"You said 'hit me'!"

Cocopops sighed. "Questions please?"

_Layton, what's under your hat?_

"I believe--"

"Just answer the question, Layton!"

Layton sighed and lifted up his hat to reveal... Hair!

"OHMIGOD!" exclaimed Luke.

Everyone else gasped/fainted.

"The centre of gravity! It's gone!" yelped Katia.

"What the tiddly-socks are you doing here?" scowled Legal.

"I could ask you the same question," growled Katia. "At least _my _game's come out."

"Quick! We must find the gravity!" gasped Layton. "Before the world ends!"

"But that means..." gulped Flora. "We need to go to the _outside_..."

Everyone stared at the window, the only way in and out. It's strange that, no matter how many people have jumped in or out of it, the outside has never really been mentioned...

**UNTIL NOW!**

One by one, the characters jumped out the window. They somehow all survived the plummet, landing like cats on their feet.

"Did someone say cats?" meowed Dahlia, twitching.

"Uhm, no. I think I just saw a cat over there though..." mumbled Don, pushing the crazy cat lady away.

There was a short, awkward silence as the characters decided on what to do next. "I'm hungry!" groaned Luke. "The last thing I've eaten was that _sponge_."

"Okay then," smiled Layton. "To the _Laytonmobile!"_

All the character ran to the Laytonmobile, and drove off, in a Batman sort of style. They parked outside a chip shop and queued up.

"While we're waiting, shall we continue with the questions?" asked Flora.

Cocopops shrugged. "All right."

_Luke, how old are you?_

"I'm FORTY-TWO!!"

Layton growled and cursed the sky quietly. _Why, Llama, WHY?_

"Here's your chips." grumbled the man, shoving the papers in Cocopops' arms.

"Okay... Who wants this one-- _HEY! LAYTON PUT LUKE DOWN_!!! ...And put your shirt back on..." barked Cocopops at the man repeatedly smashing the boys head on the floor ("My man don't own me, I own my MAN! BASEBALL!")

The cast waited for Luke and Layton to settle down, before finishing their chips and continuing the journey. Professor Layton and the missing centre of gravity. Wouldn't that be a fun game?

Luke stuck his finger in the air. "I am ten... or thirteen... or any number in between..." There was a cough. "I don't know! Stop asking hard questions!"

And so, our brave heroes resumed the quest, now that they have had their royal feast. They began trekking over deserts, swimming pass waterfalls, weaving through rainforests.

_Flora, do you have an attraction to Luke? I'd love to know!_

"What do you mean by _attraction?" _Flora narrowed her eyes into a scowl.

She was quickly tortured. "No answering questions..." started Cocopops.

"...With a question." finished the remaining characters. Ah, they learn so fast!

Flora waited before the others had walked away a few metres before answering the question. "...I don't know... I kind of see him as a brother, but..." she shook her head and caught up with the rest of the group, that were coming up with plenty of ideas.

"Well, if it's _gravity _we'relooking for, why don't we just stand still and get pulled towards it?"

"Shut up, that'll never work!"

"Yeah!"

"You're so stupid Paolo!"

**That concludes this chapter! Now for a fail attempt at suspense!**

**WILL THE GRAVITY EVER BE FOUND?!**

**WILL SOME OTHER STUFF HAPPEN?**

**WHY CAN'T I THINK THINGS THROUGH BEFORE TRYING AT BUILDING SUSPENSE?**

**MOST WILL BE REVEALED IN THE NEXT CHAPTER OF...**

**PROFESSOR LAYTON: QUESTION AND ANSWER**

*I actually have two excuses. One is real.

1: My bed is covered in cat hair, my cat is covered in dog hair, my dog has destroyed some more stuff; making me stressed, I had to revise for a test which I failed with flying colours, and I couldn't be bloody bothered to force myself to write happy stuff.

2: Cocopops has just recently escaped from Darkstar Runner. Then, in the rehearsals, Luke went all 'malignant growth' on us. So did Layton.


	23. A LOT OF PEOPLE OMG!

**Don't fret children! I have returned to fanfiction after having multiple short periods of time of the computer (actually I got a new computer! Feel the shininess!) I kinda decided that if I was gonna go on fanfiction I might as well have more that ten minutes or late-night shifts! Anywhooo~ It's another LOT'S OF PEOPLE (OMG!) chapter! Quick thanks to Yayfully Free for the beginning 'news scene' from the last chapter, and YOU for reading this (XD cheeeesy!) Sorry this ones short and I should of thought more before writing it but I'm kinda sleepy... The Layton section has filled up! I have a lot of fanfiction to read O.o!**

Luke rubbed his eyes before setting them back on the Professor again. He certainly looked... Different... "Cocopops..." he mumbled. "What's happened to the Professor?"

Cocopops let out a slight cough, wiping away a few stressfully stressful tears of stress. "Uhm. That's Layton. See? Top hat."

"But he doesn't look anything like the Profess--"

"QUESTIONS!"

"I still don't see why we just stand here and get dragged towards the gravity--" Paolo muttered under his breath.

"For god's sake!" Cocopops growled. "That's stupid Paolo! We already told you it wouldn't work! It's _gravity! _You're not even a scientist!"

"Yes I am! Do you want me to add you on my to-kill list?"

"Nah. You have enough trouble with Layton. WHERE ARE THE QUESTIONS?!"

Flora kicked some dirt. "Now we're outside we need to find the questions ourselves..."

"But we're already so good at finding puzzles that questions should be a snap!" grinned Luke.

While most of the characters were looking for puzzles, Cocopops smashed her head countless times against a tree.

"Found one!" cheered Claire, opening it up.

_Don Paolo; I can understand that with practice you can mimic others in voice, posture and attitude. However, how the HECK do you get to be the same size as someone like Flora or Luke?! They are way smaller than you!_

"Three words..." whispered Paolo. "Botox on waist."

There was an awkward cough in the crowd.

"FINE!" Paolo threw some blueprints on the floor. "See?"

"...I don't get it." Luke murmured, tugging the _Professor's _sleeve.

"Well Luke... I think he just makes costumes or something. Layton's apprentice saves the day!" Layton punched his fist into the air, unaware of the strange aura of hatred around the group.

"He's not Hershel!" shouted Claire, prodding the mystery man's chest somewhat aggressively.

The man let out a quick high-pitched cry before scampering off. Hmm.

"Wait..." thought Flora aloud. "If the writer knows everything, and Cocopops is the writers OC self, doesn't that mean she knows where Layton is and who that man was?"

Cocopops growled. "You've spent too much time reading mysteries, girl. All right! I know where he is! And I now who that man was... Claire did you have to poke him _that hard?"_

"Why don't we save Layton then?" asked Paolo (surprisingly). "You know... So we can kill him later! Yeah... manly stuff..."

"Umm... Because the writer isn't doing anything. I think she's daydreaming so we're stuck like this until she snaps out of it."

"How come we can speak if no ones writing this?"

"SHUT _UP _FLORA! Stop asking so MANY questions that aren't even in a comment! Jeez Lou-ise... M'kay let's get Layton back. First, we'll need some magic powers to defeat the beast that has eaten him, then we'll need some method of transport." Cocopops sighed, scanning the horizon... A train? A car? Anything would be good in this moment of need...

"Look over there!" gasped Luke, pointing over at the noble silhouette of several four legged creatures, their tails blowing gracefully in the winds.

"Wow! Isn't it amazing that as soon as I say that we need transport these beautiful, elegant creatures appear? Talk about continuity." Cocopops grinned, mounting one of the animals. "Who knew there where flying-llamas in Layton-world?"

"Are you sure this is safe?" asked Flora. "It could be a trick... AAIIIIIIGGHHH!!!!"

Cocopops released the button, that was handily installed on a little remote for the journey ahead. "And that's for disrespecting the llamas. Everybody on? Let's gooo!" And with that, all the llamas galloped across the air, like little starts in the sky. Only they were llamas. Don't get confused, sweetheart.

"Ooh looky! A question!" said Luke, pulling a question out of a cloud.

_Klaus... why, may I ask, do you love the professor?_

Klaus spat out the tea, which he was drinking conveniently at the exact moment of time the question was read out. "What?!"

"Why do you love the Professor?" whimpered Flora.

"Since when did I-- I never-- You must be confused with _that _lunatic!" Klaus pointed angrily at Big Luke, who was conveniently drinking a cup of tea the exact moment of time.

Meanwhile, below the llamas...

An old woman held out her hand at the brown liquid that showered the area. "Joseph! Come outside! It's raining tea!"

Back with the llamas...

"I never loved the Professor! It's not my fault there are Fangirls!" shouted Big Luke.

Klaus cackled, manically to say the least. "I bet you read LaytonXLegal Yaoi! It really is a shame that our game hasn't come out yet... Don't forget the brand new pairing; KlausXKlaus!"

Cocopops looked around. Luke seemed frozen midway through a scream... "I don't think we should break the fourth wall around him anymore. QUESTIONS!"

"We've ran out..."

"What do you mean you've have out?!" screeched Cocopops. "But this is an A LOT OF PEOPLE (OMG) chapter! There's only two..."

"Yet it's continued for four pages!" cheered Claire.

"No cheering Claire. This is too serious. Either the writer is stupid and won't make any drama happen, or it'll just end here."

...Half an hour of silent flying later...

Cocopops let out a cough. "I guess she's just stupid then. Hey...? Is that a...? Oh look! A drama llama!"

All the characters gasped and oohed at the drama llama who waved at them from the ground.

"There goes our drama..."

"I guess this is the end then..." mumbled Flora.

All of a sudden all the llamas disappeared, leaving the characters floating in the air for a while, before plummeting. That's what I call satire. Well, not really. It could be. Someone remind me of satire again...

All of a sudden the writer stopped writing. I should of checked before giving Layton a microphone AND writing this two-question a lot OF PEOPLE chapter. Oh well... insert suspense here

**Will the characters plummet to their deaths?**

**Will they find an amazing power?**

**Will they destroy the beast that has eaten Layton?**

**Can they find the gravity?**

**Will the update be quicker?**

**And longer?**

**We'll all find out in the next chapter of...**

**The amazing tales of Layton, Llamas and Lollipops, oh my!!!!**


End file.
